It's the holiday season which means many people are busy decorating, baking cookies, shopping and planning family celebrations. With that said, it can also bring about significant changes in routine. Some of these changes include breaks from school or day programs, visits from relatives who may be unfamiliar, or siblings who have moved out may return home. There may even be trips away from the comfort of our own homes. Sometimes the holidays may bring up memories of loved ones who have passed away and are no longer part of the celebrations. The holidays can also be difficult for people in group homes who don’t have much family involvement but see their housemates spend time with family over the holidays.
Here are some ways to help someone with Down syndrome enjoy the holidays and make it a merrier time for all!
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Prepare for changes in schedules and routines. Many people with Down syndrome benefit from using a visual calendar with pictures for dates when they will see family, when school or day program will not be in session, or when siblings will be at home.
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If traveling, prepare the person with Down syndrome for what to expect. If you are flying on an airplane, discuss what to expect at the airport and on the airplane. If traveling by car, set expectations regarding rest breaks and stops along the journey.
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When possible, try to avoid activities you know are going to be stressful. If someone is sensitive to crowds, it would be better to complete last-minute shopping trips when that person is not with you. If avoiding an activity is not possible, consider bringing noise-cancelling headphones, a stress ball, or other calming item to reduce stress.
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Some people with Down syndrome are very sensitive to noise and crowds or may just feel overwhelmed with the need to socialize with many relatives they do not see very often. If you are going to a large family gathering, make sure there is a space where the person with Down syndrome can take a break from the crowd if necessary. It may be helpful to identify a room away from the group that can provide some quiet and allow for less stimulation. Also having familiar items for coping like coloring books, headphones, books, drawing pads, stress balls or anything else of their choosing will help normalize the space.
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Make a book with pictures of relatives and friends the person may see at holiday gatherings. Spend some time before the gathering going through the book with the person and naming each person and their relationship. This helps the person become familiar with the people they may see around the holidays and allows for positive association.
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Spend some time role playing different conversation topics with the person with Down syndrome prior to the holiday gathering. Practice some questions the person could ask. Discuss some questions they may be asked and what they could say. If the person has limited verbal skills, you could make a book with pictures of some people and places in the person’s life for them to share with friends and family. This may make it easier for the person to interact and be part of the holiday gathering.
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Educate friends and relatives about ways to support the person with Down syndrome in social situations. For example, you may want to remind relatives to give the person enough time to process and respond to questions, share what can trigger your loved one to feel upset or overwhelmed, and/or provide ideas of favorite conversation topics.
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Stay alert for signs of anxiety or agitation. Try to catch this early so that you can help the person with Down syndrome take a few minutes to calm down and relax. Our library has several resources on healthy ways to manage stress.
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A person with Down syndrome may enjoy a repetitive activity, like stringing popcorn for the tree, making decorative construction paper chains, spinning a Dreidel, or spooning cookie dough onto a cookie sheet. An activity like this can help a person manage anxiety. This would be a good activity to try if you start to notice the person becoming anxious. It also still allows the person to take part in the holiday celebrations.
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People with Down syndrome often enjoy helping others. Focusing on a helpful task often helps manage anxiety. Give the person a helpful task to do at the holiday gathering, like setting the table, collecting the wrapping paper, organizing the gifts, or keeping young nieces and nephews busy.
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Make sure there will be food choices at the gathering to meet the person’s dietary needs. Some people with Down syndrome follow a gluten-free diet or have other dietary restrictions. It may be difficult for them if everyone else is enjoying food and they have few choices.
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Remember to have fun, let go of perfection, and remember what the holidays are about! People with Down syndrome are often very aware of how others are feeling. If parents or caregivers are feeling stressed and anxious about how holiday celebrations will go, that will only magnify the stress the person with Down syndrome may be feeling because of the changes and excitement around the holidays. Remember that the holidays will come again next year and it’s okay if everything doesn’t go perfectly. The important thing is that the family has had a chance to connect and share the holiday together and that the person with Down syndrome has been able to be part of it in whatever way best fits their needs.
Resources
Individualized Visual Schedules (article)
Visual Schedule Apps (resource list)
My Emotions Triggers (visuals)
Resources on Healthy Ways to Manage Stress (resource list)
Original article written by Shana Sexton, LCSW (December 2016). Updated by Brittany Anderson, LCSW (November 2024).